Not to yield.

I have to remind myself every day that I am not DYING of cancer, but LIVING with cancer.

Because that's the nature of this vicious beast, isn't it?

Cancer is blind when choosing its victims. Cancer doesn't care whether you're old or young, male or female, black or white, Christian or Muslim, gay or straight, good or evil. Cancer doesn't care if it's your birthday or if it's Christmas Day. Just because you're young doesn't mean you're invincible. Just because you're a parent doesn't mean you're exempt. If you are a living, breathing human, then cancer will try to destroy you by using your body as its weapon of choice, leaving you a ticking time-bomb with only what is essentially poison to fight against your own mutinous cells. Talk about a catch-22.

Am I afraid? Yes. Contrary to what my kids will tell you, I am not a robot. But I will continue to wake up each morning and get my kids ready and send them to school and go to work and come home and try to do chores and cook and run errands and remember to tell my husband that I love him before going to bed. For a brief moment I can forget that it's not "business as usual," no matter how much I wish, that in between dropping kids off at school and going to work I also have to get a test done or visit a doctor or have blood drawn. But, hey: ob-la-di ob-la-da, que sera sera, the sun will come out tomorrow, there can be miracles when you believe. Sometimes when you lose, you win. It's just hair, and it WILL grow back.

I have to remind myself every day that I'd rather have this life than no life at all.

Because that's the nature of this precious gift, isn't it?